Why I hated COLD LIGHT OF DAY

the_cold_light_of_dayThe Cold Light of Day could very well herald the apocalypse of cinema or at least the commercial end of the business.

Let start first by simply stating the obvious, you can’t kill Bruce Willis AKA Die Hard with a sniper bullet in the back.

Why? Well, beyond the fact that it’s in bad taste, it’s poor movie making.

Bruce-Willis

If you are going to kill the man that has managed to survive a million action movies then you are going to take advantage of that fact and emotionally play it up for full effect. You are going to have Bruce sacrifice himself to save his son or die ugly as a pile crushing oil cruiser landscapes his frontal lobe.

If you have him shot in the back on a calm walk back to the car, then you don’t know what makes a good movie or how to take advantage of your money or the stars it buys to sell your movie.

Bruce (Ex-CIA ) of course he is Bruce Willis, plays the father of a too handsome, kinda spoiled, semi-childlike son trying to be a businessman in his father’s eyes. Will Shaw (Henry Cavill) (Superman) yes, the type-casting starts now, plays the son of Bruce.

The-Cold-Light-of-Day-starring-Henry-Cavill-09

With a hopeful beginning of nice camera shots of sailing on the Spanish coast, pushed by father and son grist. Cavill is watchable and you can sympathasize and feel the family or at least enjoy the family dinner, even if it’s a bit obvious.

The movie declines so rapidly into the poisoned cookie-cutter of redundant scenes it makes your mind shutter with repulsion. This could have been made as a mashup with scenes from other movies and you would have never known. In fact if I was brave enough and had the time I would investigate if it really is.

I should mention the other famous actors in the movie, but I have too much respect for them to drag them through the mud. We all have to eat after all and a job is a job. It’s not their fault the director can’t find his way out of a dark closet with Jesus holding his hand and fending off the hoards with the holy cross.

So it’s all bad chase and car driving and gun waving and wooden voices sticking each other in desperation for some feedback or any realism. The Bourne jumping around by Cavill is apish and unbelievable, silly and again feels like a mashup, like the shots were just copy/pasted from other movies.

The only reason I didn’t hate this movie is because it would be disrespectful to a few of the great actors involved. Wait a sec, but I am reviewing the movie, so yeah, I hated it.

I’ll leave the script holes and wretched plot devices alone, because it would be futile to follow a thread with no trail or weight.

Sometimes you watch movies that make you want to stop ever watching movies forever. They make you feel like you are wasting your time, that you’re losing something.

I felt dirty after this movie, so I have to stop reviewing it now.

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